False Alarm

So on Tuesday night, while I was actually typing up my thoughts on my last post, I started to have contractions. I thought that they were coming rather often so I decided to start timing them. So I downloaded a contraction counter app onto my phone and started timing. The app timed how long the contractions were and how many minutes between contractions there were. All very good to know because I was asked those questions when I got to the hospital.

So I called up my parents and Kevin and let them know what was going on with me. Kevin came home from work early and I called my doctor's office and talked to the nurse on call for the night. After talking to me and asking me a bunch of questions she told me that I needed to go in to the hospital. So Kevin and I hurriedly packed stuff and then waited for my parents to come over. Once they got here I waited a little longer to see if the contractions continued, when they did we took off for the hospital. When we got there the  person at the ER desk put me right in a wheelchair and took me straight up to Labor and Delivery. There I was put in a triage room where they checked me and told me I was at 1 1/2 centimeters, they told me they would wait 2 hours and then check me again and if I had changed they would keep me. Well two hours later I was at 3 centimeters. So they took me into a delivery room. They started me on antibiotics since I have Group B Strep and told me that once I had been given all my antibiotics they would check me again. At about 11 am I had gotten all my antibiotics and so they checked me, but this time the person who checked said I felt like a 1 1/2 to a 2. Which was smaller than what I had been, which didn't seem right. So they called in my doctor who checked me and said that I felt like I was at a 3, but that since I hadn't changed much that she was going to have me take a 1 hour walk and if nothing had changed after that then they were going to send me home.

So we went on a one hour walk around the Maternity unit, which I must say was exhausting. My hips hurt so bad after I was done. But I hadn't changed and so I was sent home finally. But my doctor told me that in her estimation I was in early labor and that she would not be surprised if I had the baby within the next few weeks. She said that if I was still pregnant come next Thursday that she would strip my membranes and see if I went. I am hoping I deliver before she goes on vacation. Crossing my fingers.

Emergency Room

As those of you who follow my facebook know I ended up in the emergency room Thursday night. It was due to chest pain. It started late Thursday night as I was feeding Davy, it felt like pressure in my chest. Almost like someone was sitting on it from the inside. Needless to say I kind of freaked out. I laid Davy down to see if lying down myself would help things. It did not. Davy had not been laid down properly, aka waiting till he fell asleep and such so he was screaming and I was lying there hoping the pain went away and wishing I could hold Davy and calm him down. I finally got back up and picked him up and after more chest pain I finally freaked out enough that I called my mom and asked her to come over. Usually I would just tough things out and not really worry too much about stuff but the idea of Davy without a mom freaked me out enough to seek out help.

When my mom came over she told me to call up my doctor and see what they told me. Of course my doctor wasn't there at that time of night but I did get an answering service that had a doctor on call give me a call. The doctor talked to me, and talked to my mom, and then said that I should go to the emergency room just in case. So I called Kevin up and told him to come home and take me to the emergency room. It was about 5 minutes till he got off of work anyway, so it worked out ok.

We had to go to Rockford for the emergency room so it was a 30 minute ride, Kevin was pretty worried the entire trip there. When we got there they took me in and hooked me up to an EKG machine. Then they moved me into room, gave me an IV, took some blood, did a chest X-ray on me, and eventually gave me a CAT scan. The CAT scan required them to inject iodine contrast into my blood, and because of that I had to pump and dump for the next 24 hours. It seemed like such a waste of milk. Thankfully I had some frozen milk so Davy has had less formula than he would have had otherwise. As it is though I am still behind. I need to get my milk supply going again. While I was in the hospital I wasn't able to pump until the very end, such a painful time, I ended up leaking all over my hospital gown and down my chest as well. Not fun at all.

After all the tests it turns out that I have bronchitis, they gave me a prescription for antibiotics, as well as an inhaler. Davy is doing well, he was watched by my mom Thursday night/Friday morning. Both Kevin and my mom worked together to help me get a lot of sleep once I got home. I am feeling a lot better today, I just wish I wasn't so behind on milk production.

I have strep where???

This post deals with medical issues...

Stress, fear, I no longer know my emotions

Yesterday I began to spot. I have been told that spotting can be normal in pregnancy. I noticed it right before going to a friend's house. One who knows about my pregnancy, but really hadn't been able to wish me congrats in person yet. With the spotting on my mind it was difficult to be as thankful as I should have been for her congratulations. I felt unsure and awkward.

Last night was terrible. After I returned I googled "spotting at 5 weeks pregnant" of course it pulled up stories from people who miscarried. I pretty much freaked out, I prayed, I wept, and I begged for everything to be ok. This morning I called my doctor's office at 6 am, the message said they didn't open till 6:30 am. The closed office message didn't go down though until about 5 minutes to 7 am. The nurse I needed to talk to wasn't there and so I left a message. (It didn't help that last night I had a dream about going to the doctor's office and speaking to the nurse face to face and having her tell me that it sounded like I lost the baby and that she really couldn't care less) At about 11 am she called me back and told me that it sounded like I would be ok, and that if I started having severe stomach pain and cramping and began to bleed a lot then I should worry and contact them immediately. I took that to mean that if that happened then I would be definitely losing the baby. She told me to take things easy and not to lift anything heavy. I told my manager and she had the meeting I had scheduled for later that day then and there and then sent me home. The meeting itself stressed me out a good deal. And tomorrow I have another meeting that will stress me out pretty good.

Today has been weird for me. I don't know quite how to feel. I feel tired, worn out, and worried about this. I have not really wanted to talk to anyone and so I fear I was snarky at work with certain people. My father in law called and left a message to see how everything was going. I could not call him back, I really did not want to talk about any of it at that point. I still feel torn, what if it all fails, now, now that I have told everyone? I just don't know anymore...should I let things out, should I keep things in? All I feel I can do now, is keep up hope, and wait till Friday for the ultrasound. It seems strange now, I know I should be excited, like I was, about the ultrasound. But at this point I can only worry, and hope everything is ok.